Drowning

That's how he's going to go. They're making him as comfortable as possible... to drown in his own body fluid. It's a horrible thing to listen to. It's a horrible thing to watch someone drowning, trying not to drown, panicking and fighting. I can't get past the feeling I get when I think that just last week he was here, walking around, being grumpy, talking, existing. Just last week. I don't know how I'm supposed to feel... so I just kinda want to withdraw away from it and everything else until it's over and everyone has moved on from it. That can't be healthy, but things have been so hard lately that I'm just too confused and scared to know what else to do. How mature is that shit?

Anyway, not everything is bad right now. Aikido is good. Metroid Prime 3 is good. My friends are great. My dog is an oddity as always. My house is comforting (though I need to get some cleaning and weed pulling done, /sigh). Ooh, and girls are as cute as ever. If that last one ever went away... I dunno man... would there even be a reason to keep on living???