I did a bad thing, Rem... I did a bad thing.

Rough day. Was angry at a friend, but gave up on that because it's not worth it and she did the best she could. More angry at myself and the way the universe chooses to balance itself with my life. But I need to talk about something else.

A long while back, my family picked up a couple of chocolate lab puppies. We watched them grow, and when my step dad passed on they became the big link to a time gone by for my mom. About a year and a half ago, they passed away from old age and the various cancers of life. It was a rough time. Maybe a month later my mom found a yellow lab at the pound and brought him home. This dog has had the kind of life you only see on the Animal Precinct show on APL. He was once beaten so hard that he was paralyzed in his hind legs. He still has a hump where his spine has been bent out of shape from the blow, and his fur there doesn't grow nice and soft like it should. He cowers when you raise something over your head and he gets agitated at strange men wearing hats or strange men taking a jog. He knows pain and yet he's still lively and loving. Everyone that's been around him has fallen in love with how sweet he is. He turned four sometime this year.

I went home tonight to do some ironing. Watched some baseball with my grandpa and griped at my mom about the man, the system, and how Winco won't take debit cards in the year 2004. I also got to be the one to find the bump, roughly the circumfrance of a baseball and the thickness of about a half-inch in his neck. I'm not scared... or worried... I'm just sad. The universe has a sick way of balancing itself out sometimes. Hopefully the vet will shine a ray of light on this.